How Do You Deal With The Pain of a Losing Your Ex?
It’s not an easy thing to do. First, you need to let yourself feel ALL the feelings involved with the loss of love. As you have heard before, “Time Heals All Wounds”. It truly does, but only when you don’t stuff in your pain during the process. Your heart will heal quicker if you sever all contact until your heart doesn’t bleed anymore. That is my advice. Don’t check up on them either. Just HEAL. Like how a broken leg needs to heal, one day at a time. Leave it alone. Don’t pick at the proverbial scab. Your self confidence will continue to raise a little more every day. And remind yourself, that when you deeply love, you run the risk of deeply hurting. And if you deeply hurt, that means you truly opened yourself up. You took a big risk for something bigger than yourself, and you got WAY OUT of your comfort zone. This is commendable – a real soul level compliment to you.
It’s very possible that your Ex may want to be friends, or have a “casual” relationship down the road, but doesn’t want “relationship” status. I have found this causes alot of complicated feelings and pain, if you have not totally let go. So I do not suggest this.
If you want to truly get rid of the pain, you need to follow some tried and true steps that others have used through out the years to move on, and to create a HAPPIER life, than they ever thought was possible. Don’t play around in the luke-warm pool too long, of “what ifs”.
This is YOUR time to heal, and to become a better person. I see it like your heart broke into a million pieces. And the Universe is going to take all those pieces, and assemble you into a masterpiece. But you have to “go with it”.
I am giving the advice that you do everything you can to move on. But I also know that TRUE LOVE WILL work its way out. If the Universe meant for you 2 to be together, it WILL happen.
The problem is when people don’t attend to their recovery first. Let Go. Be Angry. Forgive. Cry. Your feelings will change day to day. BE COMPASSIONATE WITH YOURSELF. Please. This is so incredibly important in helping you deal with your pain. Be a very, very good friend to yourself right now. Create New Experiences and put all these “What Ifs” in the Hands of the Universe. If it’s meant to be , it will be. For now…..Create a Magical Life and take care of your heart. You need to trust yourself – that you will take care of yourself, and so will the Universe.
The thing you are FIGHTING for is —> true love. Whether that be with yourself (well, it always needs to be with yourself first and foremost), possibly with your Ex one day down the road when certain things are worked out, or with your Soul Mate that you have not quite met/imagined yet. You need to fight for TRUE LOVE that encompasses passion, truth, mutuality, respect and authenticity. This in-between break up pain, is just a phase you are going through, to get you to the other side of Deeper Love.
Also remember, it is VERY LOVING & respectful to let your Ex work through his sh*t right now, too! He needs to figure out his life and healing process, too. True Love ALWAYS wants the other person to grow. Even if you are pissed & hurt as hell, remember how beautiful and strong you truly are. You can find that sacred part in you, that can wish him well. This will help your pain. In this way, you can continue your “love” relationship with him, without it hurting you or him. True Love is Far Beyond what we think it is.
One Last Tip—>This may be a big WAKEUP from the Universe to reach deep into your spirituality. If its been a while since you have explored it..now would be a perfect time to re-connect to that deeper part of you. Sometimes (often) we “hit rock bottom” when we lose who we love. These are the times our hearts have a literal hole, and we need some Universe Love to come fill it up…………
My Prayer for the day:
Dear Universe (your higherpower) – Please help me get through this very long day, this very long night. Please help me not obsess over (****). Please fill my heart with peace & re-direct this negative energy and sadness I am feeling. Please comfort me – thank you for giving me a heart that has the capacity to love so deeply. Please help that sensitive heart heal and please do not let me suffer alone in this…….please fill my heart with something better than what I am feeling right now….please stop my mind from ruminating over every thing….please direct my energies to something positive i can do / experience right now………please protect me from my own negative self talk……….please help me breathe deep & find something constructive to do or think next………thank you…..